I love this vodka, I drink it everyday. My friend Svetlana loves it too. Most times it causes a blackout and or unprotected unintentional sex but those are the dangers we face living as hardcore alcoholics. I recommend buying it by the case and mixing it with sugar free kool aide or drinking it straight right from the freezer whilst eating dollar menu cheeseburgers from Burger King

Never have I tasted a finer serum than this exquisite beverage. It is a wondrous concoction of spice and taste, tingling the farthest reaches of the the consumers palette. It is so fine that some say it flows straight from the heavens above flowing down like Spring’s first rain. I would not only recommend this, but I would go as far as to say that anyone who’s lips have not been graced by the touch of this sleek drink, may wallow forever in their misery for what they have missed.

Forget the trolls and wordsmiths on here I’ll give you the bottom line. It gets the job done. The taste isn’t bad and they claim 80 proof on this vodka. If your’e mixing vodka it all tastes the same basically. If you’re drinking straight or on the rocks then what in blazes are you drinking vodka for! You drink scotch for the aroma and flavor/savor, not vodka. Can’t comment on the hangover as this is the first time trying aristocrat so I’ll let you know in the morning but for $9 for a liter it’s a cheap way to mix some drinks for a party. The more distilled the vodka the less the hangover but if you drink ANY alcohol enough you’ll wake up feeling like a satchel of dildoees. Good party booze and made in the us of a.

Aristocrat is simply – Vodka. Do not be fooled with all the marketing that goes into any type of liquor/spirit. The bottle, the label……..all marketing and wanting the consumer to think differently. Prodcuts are made cheaply for many reasons – ingredients, where, the labor to produce……etc. Think of it as clothing – just because it has a simple branded emblem does not make it betterand that is the same behind Aristokrat Vodka and other brands, Drink Aristocrat – chill it or mix it – it is all the same and produces the same results. Aristocrat fan for years. ( and yes have tried many others – there is no difference with BASIC vodka and even gin, don’t be fooled by the fancy bottle or label.

As an alcoholic I must say, aristocrat is a truly fine vodka. Cheap, 100% grain neutral spirits! What more could you want! The taste is similar to paint thinner, but with a sweet, chalky after taste that lingers long after the burn of your wild turkey chaser has become a distant memory.
If I was to describe an aristocrat blackout, I would liken it to senator’s club whiskey or perhaps drain-o. While the length and intensity of the blackout may be more intense, it’s simply lacking the homey, full bodied feeling you get after blacking out on a fine Cabernet. As a go-for-broke drinker, this is of no concern to me, but it may be an issue to a more casual alcoholic.
In conclusion, aristocrat is a fine beverage and more than worth you’re money. Perhaps smirnoff or even skyy have a more “tolerable” flavor, If you’re looking for a way to quickly kick back a few double shots and let the sting help you forget about alimony payments, then you can’t do better. Cheers!

Vodka is Vodka, I work at a bar and have tasted every vodka that there is., Aristocrat taste the same as any other vodka no matter the price.

Total garbage go buy a bottle of rubbing alcohol it’ll taste better.

Best to buy a round to fuck with your friends. It is for a good laugh.

Haha i sneak this into lollapalooza every year. Its cheap ,the bottles are small and it will get the job done. I think i will continue with this “tradition” for years to come, oh yeah it tastes like crap and i usually mix it with sweet leaf tea which doesn’t help at all.

Scene: two mice and one cat enter a bathroom.

——the lights go out——

The cat takes the first pull of the sweet and savory ‘crat. He licks his paws.

Mouse #1 is shaking in his moccasins. He takes the handle from the cat and takes a slightly shorter pull. He barely remains standing upright and passes it to mouse #2. Mouse #2 is brave but his bravery is misplaced. He takes a long pull and is inches from throwing up his dinner from two weeks ago. His soul grows cold.

——round 2——

Father Cat, eyes bloodshot, grabs the bottle with vigor. He dips his nose in, closes his eyes, and faces a 12 second pull. He screams with rage. Mouse#1 and #2 are quaking with fear. Minutes pass. Mouse #1 begrudgingly accepts the bottle and takes a meek 7 second pull. Mouse #2 follows suit. Neither are in good shape. Both want mercy. But the cat refuses. He wants another round.

——round 3——

The cat himself licks the entirety of the bottle. He chuckles. This is but a game to him. One might say, a game of cat and mouse. He forcefully grabs the bottle from the worthless mice and screams “CLOCK.” The mice fearfully pass the bottle. The cat, in fitting manner, houses a ruthless pull. There were no survivors. The two mice, with their lives now at stake, quickly accept their fate. Mouse #1, in an attempt to save mouse #2’s life, grabs the bottle, closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, says goodbye, and takes his final pull. It was sweet, sour, short, and everything he never wanted. 8 seconds pass. His life hangs by the balance. 5 more seconds. Mouse #2 looks on in agony. 6 more seconds. And then it happens.

——the aftermath——

Mouse #1 explodes is vomit as far as the eye can see. The dark bathroom becomes alive for a shockingly sweet moment for the cat himself and mouse #2. For they survived. But mouse #1 was on the ground. Heart barely beating. His life now had meaning. He had saved mouse #2 from the grips of the cat himself. Time passes…

——lights come on——

There were three survivors. The cat licks his paws contently. He was happy with how his mice performed. Mouse #2 was counting his blessings leaving the bathroom. As soon as he got out he scurried for his life. Mouse #1 lay lifeless on the ground. The cat grabbed his neck and told him what is dead may never die. For he was a despicable vermin. The cat tells him, “until the next crat session.” Mouse #1 nods his head, knowing this is not the end. His lifeless corpse drags itself out of the bathroom. The cat leaves to bask in the nighttime moonlight. Mouse #2, when it is safe, returns to take care of mouse #1. They count their blessings. They know they survived another crat by the cat.

——crat——

You’ve been warned. The cat and his mice are always watching and waiting for their next opportunity to crat themselves in a dark bathroom.

——fin——

This has been a rendering of the aristocrats by the cat himself and his two mice.

—— in honor of modest mouse——

It “works” but is not that enjoyable I recommend seagrams vodka for a balance of price and taste. And of that is too steep as well try Brunettes’

I’ve never had a vodka as bad as this one. This is the LAST RESORT. If you buy this you only care about getting wasted and spending the less amount of money. Don’t ever get this vodka unless you HAVE to. I suggest if you really have to consider in buying this drink in not drinking at all or getting the most sugary drink you can find to mix it with. Good luck.

Mein freund kaufen Aristocrat vodka für mich im Peking für ein geschenkt. Es ist billig aber schlect und ist gleich isopropyl alcohol. Spären dein gelt und verkauf etwas besser.

(Editor’s note: I think this roughly translates, “My friend bought Aristocrat for me in Beijing. It’s cheap but it’s bad, equal to isopropyl alcohol. Save your money and buy something better.”)

New to the area and decided to stop at the local bar to check it out. I asked what they served as their well vodka. I usually order a name brand unless it’s Smirnoff or better. The bartender told me EVERYONE DRINKS THE ARISTOCRST WELL VODKA. Not to be a snob, I agreed to this crap. Never, ever again! Terrible headache!

This shit’ll get you wasted. Enjoy.

Aristocrat Royal Vodka is a top notch vodka at a bottom dollar price.
Only Gray Goose excels it for pure taste and smoothness.

Tasted like rubbing alcohol

Just started with booze again. This vodka gets the most bang for the buck. I don.t drunk just maintain my buzz. It ain’t half bad, taste like most house brand booze.
Your a snob if you rank on this stuff to hard. I do recommend ice cold to drink it straight. Mix with cola or koolaid. 5 stars for a value buzz

When you are on a single income and want a buzz, Aristocrat will not let you down!!!guarunteed!,,,

Hungover as shit.but the taste is better than I remember barrable with a sip of Sprite first giving a 2 because I’ve had worse

Never drink this without a mixer, it will sure mess you up. I’ve been mixing it without mango juice, it is not bad, gives me the buzz.

ummm… fuckin nasty. but after a few sips you wont even care. best if drank while listening to the one and only Miles Davis. not that he has anything to do with this but it makes it bearable…

ummm… fuckin nasty. but after a few sips you wont even care. best if drank while listening to the ond and only Miles Davis. not that he has anything to do with this but it makes it bearable…

As a vodka drinker who has tasted every kind of vodka there is I can’t tell the difference in the cheap stuff and the top shelf. I can tell the difference in whisky brandy scotch ect. Am I the only one like this when it comes to vodka. I have been drinking about a pint a day for fifty years.

Please save your money. This so called “vodka” is a disgrace to the vodka name. It’s as if you are drinking rubbing alcohol…which would probably be better.

I wish I had read your review before buying a cheap bottle of this poison. I’m 58 years old and I honestly don’t remember getting anything this bad, even in college. I just wanted a little vodka to mix with some fruit juice and didn’t want to waste the good stuff. My advice…waste the good stuff. (or keep some mouthwash handy)

Not horrible. You get what you pay for.
Ive had better vodka, but not for the price.
People comparing it to rubbing alcohol obviously never had the misfortune of tasting rubbing alcohol.
Gives a good buzz, never had a hangover with it.
I prefer whiskey – but for $9 bucks I can’t get decent Whiskey – But I can get Vodka that I can drink straight when chilled. 4 shots every few hours – & its a good day.

I’ve been drinking this vodka for about 3 months now. It not bad as far as getting a buzz, but you most defiantly would want to mix it with something. But last night, the upper part of my stomach started burning really bad and hurting. I don’t have any idea why. So, I did some research, and they said that the wrong type of vodka can eat the lining off of your stomach. I don’t think that’s what’s going on with me, but I never felt like that before I began drinking this vodka. So please people, if anyone else have these same problems, please post it so the company can see that their product is messing people up.